SO glad I did not go back to Rome...

I just checked something on the internet, and 150 euros are 243 American dollars. If you haven't been using foreign currency lately, this probably doesn't really register, but it registers to me. The dollar is ever decreasing, and the euro just keeps getting better. Luckily my dollar is still very good in most parts of the world, including here, but I'll never go back to live in Europe. And they are some lucky bastards.

Up next on the list of potential living destinations:

Puerto Rico
Costa Rica
Hawaii

I'm not saying it will be soon... I'm just saying. :)

Leave me ALONE!

Today a chubby Indonesian boy, around 20-years-old, who has been following me and staring at me for a few days now, approached me as I attempted to rest by the pool. The conversation went as follows:

Boy: “Hi! You Italy?”
Me: (pissy voice because I saw this coming) “What?!”
Boy: “You Italy? Where you from?”
Me: “America.”
Boy: “Who you come here with?”
Me: (really pissy voice because I can see right through him) “What?! Come where, the hotel?”
Boy: “You come alone?”
Me: “No, I came with my boyfriend.” (grabbing my things to leave after only 10 minutes)
Boy: “Where you go tonight?”
Me: “What?!”
Boy: “Where you going tonight?”
Me: “To sleep.”
Boy: “Maybe you come with me. I buy you drinks.”
Me: “I don’t think so. I have to go now.”
Boy “You give me your number?”
Me: “I can’t do that. Bye.”
I am not pissed because this boy had NO clue, and was EXTREMELY forward with me. That is just stupid. It’s worth a laugh. I AM pissed because last night I saw him chatting with the security guards who work here, and following me with his eyes as he did so. He was gathering information about me, and he obviously got access to something (otherwise he would not have come out of no where with the Italy thing, and he would not have still thought he could ask me out, after I told him that I was with a boyfriend). He knew that I was alone. He probably knew more than that about me. And you know something, I don’t like that. I am going to have a “word” with someone. Grr.

Sick and tired

Today I am physically sick… fever and exhaustion. Taking a day to lay low, and not expect too much of myself productivity wise. But even taking a day to lay low is making me stress a little. Something’s gotta give, I can feel a major breakthrough coming. I know something is about to change. I have gotten some suggestions to just take a trip back to the US for a few weeks. That’s not going to work right now. I’d have to fork out at least 1,500 dollars, find a place to stay, and pay an arm and a leg to get my tooth fixed. It’s just not doable right now. I am leaving my options open, but going to the completely opposite side of the world is not one I am considering, even though it would be really nice to see the family. I think I might move from the house I am living in. This place is within the confines of a hotel property, and I am one of 5 people doing a long-term stay in one of the “houses”. But one of the things I have learned traveling abroad is that there are certain countries in which the culture is extremely nosy. And this is one of them. People want to know too much, and they talk too much, especially since they know you don’t understand their gossip. And homey don’t play that. If I am going to pay to live in your establishment, I will not have the people who work here asking me personal questions, or whispering about me as I walk by. I aint no fool. And my business is none of yours. I need a change.

SH*T, F*CK, and every other bad word!!!!!!!!!!!!

This evening, while eating a very late dinner of beans and rice, I bit on a pebble that was carelessly left amongst the beans (every foodie knows that beans need to be washed and sifted for pebbles!). This is the second time that this has happened to me in the same restaurant, but the first time when I bit extremely hard into a ROCK the size of my thumb nail, I did not complain because I assumed it was the very rare exception. This time, the stone was not even big enough for me to catch, but I felt it, and I sure felt my front tooth break off (my beloved crown that I have referred to in a past posting). It broke COMPLETELY off. I am so in shock right now. What more do I need?! This was my FRONT tooth, and the one tooth that has caused me so much strife, and at the same time so much happiness after it had finally been perfectly completed as a crown. I now resemble Jethroe Bodine (with a tan). Tomorrow morning I will phone these supposed “expat” dentistry places, but I do not expect American service or quality. I am devastated. All I wanted was something to eat, since I have not even been feeding myself regularly, and now I am left with no smile, and no desire to even open my mouth. I am hideous and I look like a hillbilly. Put this on top of a break-up which was actually finalized TODAY, and you have a miserable Leah. I have no more words. I am so upset...

Might take a lil break

I don't think I want to blog very much for a few days. I don't even know how I really feel about many things right now, and I don't think attempting to assign words to the confusion will bring me clarity.

P.S. I really don't like when people hurt you, and then decide they didn't mean to, especially when you didn't ask them to decide they didn't mean to... I probably make no sense. Gotta go review work histories of IT executives entered by an Indian outsourced team that doesn't know UPS and United Parcel Service are the same company. Not their fault. I am in a pissy mood. Grr.

Truth

You can make someone a cake.
You can make someone’s bed.
You can make someone a bet.
You can even make someone a promise.
But you cannot make someone feel happy, or safe, or secure, or alive.
No matter what, you can never decide how someone else feels. And trying to do so is battling one of the only true laws of this universe. Why don’t most humans get that?